Sometimes when on a plane, the sweet sounds of Zeppelin (or Hall & Oates) aren’t enough to block out the hum of the engines, the crying babies, the guy who’s really jazzed about his upcoming business meeting, or the insane Sudoku player who has taken to mumbling random number sequences to himself at a surprisingly loud volume. So, what to you? Well, you seek out Noise Canceling Headphones, of course.

The folks from Sony claim that their model will “reduce ambient sound by over 10dB at 300Hz.” And what does that mean for us air travelers, Sony?

“…you’ll hear more music, and less plane…”

Ah, I know there’s a lyric in there somewhere.

As always, let me know if you’ve traveled with Sony’s Noise Canceling Headphones or those of Sony’s competitors.

Have a great Long Weekend!

Interesting footnote to the troubles of Sen. Larry Craig of Idaho (he of Bathroom-Bust fame, as CNN put it).

While Craig was being grilled by the cops after the restroom incident, the senator apparently indicated he was worried about missing his flight (see the whole police report on The Smoking Gun). Anyway, one of the detectives tried to call the airline to hold the plane. The airline did not answer the phone.

Imagine that! Personally, I’m thrilled to know that an airline responds as well to the police (calling on behalf of a U.S. Senator, no less) as they do when I call, which is to say, they don’t respond at all!

Not a good day for the senator, all in all.

Well, it’s only been in the air a few days, but the Vatican’s charter airline (run by Itlay’s Mistral Air) is already facing issues the other airlines have been dealing with for years. In this case, it’s the ban on liquids. Pilgrims who spent hours waiting to get holy water from the grotto at the Shrine in Lourdes were told at the gate that they couldn’t bring the holy water on their return flight if it was in containers larger than 100ml.

As reported by the BBC, “Francesco Pizzo, Mistral Air’s president, said the company had to respect international regulations on the matter.”

While many passengers were, of course, disappointed, the airline did give holy water in small bottles shaped like the Virgin Mary to everybody on the flight.

REVIEW: VIRGIN AMERICA AIRLINES

Its dawn at LAX, and Im tired and cranky. The good news is, the people who work at Virgin America are neither; in fact, they’re so relentlessly chirpy and perky, that if I didn’t know better, I’d start wondering about substance abuse issues. But no, these folks were just darn nice. And so was their airline!

I flew Virgin America from Los Angeles to San Francisco and back this past Monday, traveling First Class one way, Economy the other. I took advantage of just about everything Branson’s baby had to offer, and here’s what I liked.

MOOD LIGHTING: Thought this was going to be truly stupid: I envisioned lava lamps throbbing away throughout the cabin, bathing all in an eerie glow. Turns out, I liked my mood lighting and I was not alone. “Whoa!” said a passenger on entering the cabin, “this looks sweet, man.” And what does sweet look like? Well, picture a semi-dark cabin enlivened with a pinky-purpley aura, the sort of colors little girls dress Barbie in. Sounds sick, but it works! And its actually quite soothing, with an added bonus: we haggard-looking passengers appeared almost human under these oh-so-flattering lights.

MEN IN BLACK: The female flight attendants uniforms were so-so: uninspired red sweaters over white blouses with black slacks. Different story for the guys, though; they looked like international men of mystery! Very trendy in their black shirts and black pants; a little retro, a little futuristic, a whole lot cool. Oh, and I saw 2-pilots, and guess what? THEY WERE WEARING THE SAME BLACK-ON-BLACK OUTFITS! Tres egalitarian!

RUB ME THE RIGHT WAY: The massage chair; this is why First Class was invented! You hit the button on the armrest (see my finger, above left) and then curl your toes in ecstasy (see my curled toes hidden by shoes above right). I should say, these first class seats are comfortable even without the massage mechanism; sort of like sitting in your Dads La-Z-boy. But press the button and go ahhh. Then do it again!

FINE FOOD: In First Class, we got a free breakfast of fruit and yogurt and prosciutto and pickle, stylishly served in sqare-cornered cups. When I switched over to Economy, we got Red. Red is the seat-back screen for all passengers, and Red has many functions including food service. Watch Red display a menu; you order by simply touching the screen, then swiping your credit card.

FREE DELIVERY: Once you order your food, a flight attendant brings it to you immediately; you don’t have to wait while everyone else is served from that sloooow-moving cart.

FUN AND GAMES: Virgin America has movies and music, and even TV, but so do other airlines. Ah, but do other airlines give you the ability to chat with someone seated 20-rows behind you? Virgin does; just pick out a user-name for yourself (see mine, above) and see if anyone will talk to you, or perhaps have you arrested for stalking.

The best thing about Virgin? The airline did as promised: it got me where I needed to go, when I needed to be there, and at a more than fair price.
Of course, the prices may go up, but I suspect the quality will remain the same, or it will, if Richard Branson keeps those all those nice people I met this week, right where they should be on the job.

–Anne

I flew Richard Branson’s latest brainstorm this week, and–I liked it! Expect a full review in the next couple of days, but for now, let me just say that VA was all about the zippy little cup-holder, the seats with the magic fingers and that Barbie-colored pinky-purpley mood lighting (which actually made us haggard-looking passengers appear almost human during the 6am flight).

Oh, and Ill tell you about the Men in Black, as well.
Photos, too!

–Anne

It might be the smallest country in the world, but Vatican City just got its own airline. As reported by Reuters, the maiden voyage departed from Rome and took flight today. The airline is designed to make travel easier for Catholic pilgrims who want to make their way to such religious sites as the shrine at Lourdes, the shrine at Fatima, Mt. Sinai, and more. The Vatican airline employs a chartered 737 that is run by Italy’s Mistral Air. The Vatican foresees close to 150,000 pilgrims using the airline each year, and it is committed to making air travel as easy and affordable as possible for those travelers.

Flights on the airline will include religious messages and religious entertainment, as well as a full crew who will be there to provide standard air travel service.

Cramped airline seats have never been the best place to rest your weary bones, but now as travelers spend more time sitting on the tarmac and more time in the air, flights can be downright painful. Well, the folks behind Best Seat believe they have the answer to all your in-flight muscle pain woes:

“Best Seat is not like anything you have ever experienced before. This new-patented CCPM Technology gently changes the pressure points under you as you sit to greatly increase the circulation in your buttocks and thighs while you sit.”

Well, who can argue with increased circulation in the buttocks?

Best Seat has been used by air travelers, truck drivers, and people who just sit a lot, and it made it on to MSNBC’s 20 Great Travel Gadgets list. It’ll run you about $225. I’d love to hear if anyone has used it and found it at as exciting as they make it sound.

Speaking of airline seat massages; my fellow Standard Upright Positioner, Anne, will be flying First Class on Virgin America very soon, and she’s going to let everybody know how relaxing their built-in chair-massage truly is. I, too, will be flying soon. Of course, I’ll be in coach on American, so I’ll let you know how those free sodas work out.

Yes, we KNOW there aren’t enough armests, but no, you dont fight for them; its first come, first served! Well, kinda. There actually are etiquette rules to follow in the wonderful world of air travel, just as there are etiquette rules to follow at orgies; it sort of boils down to a do unto others in both instances. But this whole etiquette deal can get complicated, and it strikes me that American fliers are crying out for a leader in this area.

Sure theres some advice out there and some of its pretty good, but nothing addresses ALL our etiquette questions are concerns, sowhod like to see a weekly air travel advice column? Is that a yes? A YES??? I thought so. Maybe well do this once a week.

Send your questions to anne@farecompare.com. Questions can be serious or stupid; as far as Im concerned, the thirst for knowledge knows no IQ.

Who made me an expert? I did. Plus, Ive read my mothers 1938 edition of Emily Post many, many times.

Love me some Craigs List: for jobs, lost & found, those all important “missed connections”, AND for travel advice.

The advice is often excellent, nuanced and insightful; but what I like best are those areas of the forum that read like stand-up comedy. Okay, maybe high school stand-up comedy but it cracks me up every time (at least, the LA version does, but I suspect NY, Chicago and other cities have just as many pithy posters). A recent highlight was a discussion on the merits of New York City that degenerated into a virtual smackdown (the term “moron” got a real good workout).

Among my favorite Q & As:

Q: Need info about NM and AZ!
A: Sure, they’re two states between CA and TX!
Q: Tell me about passport expeditors!
A: There are also palm readers, about as useful.
Q: How to know if on No Fly list?
A: Do you have a terrorist cell or something?
Q: Where is the best city/country to get pregnant?
A: How stupid can you be?

Besides the above, the site has great information. And, you’ll never be bored.

There’s an old saying, “It’s never too early to start thinking about a three-day weekend.” OK, so that’s not really an old saying, it’s just something I tell myself to keep me going. However, with a three-day weekend just two weeks away, it does seem like an appropriate time to focus on Labor Day getaways.

The folks at Hotwire have put together a list of the most popular Labor Day destinations. Here are the top 5:

1. Chicago, Illinois
2. New York City, New York
3. Atlanta, Georgia
4. St. Louis, Missouri
5. Boston, Massachusetts

Once again, Chicago tops the list, and it’s no surprise really. Here are just a few of the perks the Windy City offers for the holiday weekend:

• fireworks at Navy Pier
• wine tastings and picnics
• Even a bit of Gaelic football.

However, if you’re not into vino or obscure sports, you can still take advantage of the food, shopping, and entertainment Chicago offers all year round.

Other major markets like NY and Atlanta are also high on the list of desired long weekend getaways. Generally, the big cities see a lot of short-term travelers during Labor Day, because there are plenty of hotel rooms to be found and plenty of sites to see in a short period of time. But if you’re eschewing the big city for a more secluded three-day getaway, pass on your trip ideas to us and your fellow travelers. Who knows, your comment could help someone plan the perfect vacation, fall in love, and live happily ever after. Or at least it could just help them get out of town for a few days.

A very nice young couple is awaiting take-off from Newark to San Francisco, on Continental.

And waiting, and waiting. Shocker, no?

Anyway, they have their 2-spawn with them, aged 3 and 1. And there’s no AC. And it’s hot. And the kids are thirsty. And they’re starting to die.

Our hero, a mild-mannered Clark Kentish-type, asks the flight attendant for some water. “When we’re in the air”, she snaps. Hero waits for her to move on, then calmly rises, heads for the galley, and secures said water.

Not much of a story, huh? Well, the heck with you! I see it as tiny piece of the vast mosaic that makes up the great morality play called, “Little People on the Plane: Sometimes They Win.”

Of course, had he been arrested, I’d have had to call this “Little People in Jail.” Whatever.

Over at our boss’s website, his article on the Knee Defenders has gotten some readers really riled (see OUR post on the gadget below).

Seems a lot of people are outraged over this product, because it could prevent them from lowering their seats.

Will fights break out? Will chaos ensue? Will heads explode? All I can say is, next time you board a plane, keep your cell phone camera handy!

Then send your pictures to us. We’ll share. Promise.

You KNEW there had to be a tape of this; a tape of that 26-year old flight attendant who was “escorted” off a flight in Lexington, KY not too long ago. You know, the one who allegedly told a pilot, “You’re dead!” I am shocked, shocked to report that this episode seems to have involved the consumption of alcoholic beverages (according to court documents).

As I said, a video tape of her subsequent booking has surfaced; take a look. Funny thing is, court records apparently peg her blood alcohol level at just .03 which isnt much considering drivers are considered drunk at .08 (well, in a lot of states, anyway).

The tape, though, is not a picture of sobriety. And, oooh, girl, the mouth on you!

Been doing a lot of flying lately. Sorta like saying, Been having a lot of root-canal lately. But not as much fun.

It has, however, been interesting!

Flew Southwest on Friday (August 10th). And, surprise, surprise, the flight (out of LAX) was delayed. The good news is, we actually got an explanation. The bad news is, we got 3-explanations. Choose your favorite and discuss!

WHY THE DELAY?

1. AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL. When the delay was first announced at the gate, there were a few groans, but no general uprising. However, those groans apparently set off the woman at the Southwest ticket counter, who made a point of getting on the microphone and saying, For those wondering about the delay, its because of Air Traffic Control. Air Traffic Control! AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL!!! [The guy next to me responded with a muttered, Okay. Okay! OKAY!!!] And, anyway, whatta they mean, Air Traffic Control? No clue here.

2. WEATHER. Alright, so we were about an hour late boarding the plane, and were greeted by a perky flight attendant who apologized for the weather delay! Well, it was hot everywhere, but there wasn’t much weather anywhere in the country, but hey! No one calls on me to forecast hurricanes, so who knows?

3. MECHANICAL. This explanation came courtesy of Mr. Pilot: Sorry, folks, but we had a mechanical problem, we’ll be in the air shortly.

So which was it? Or is it simply that ANY excuse is good enough for us pathetic rabble? I mean, people, make up your minds. If you don’t know what the problem is, SAY so. Funny thing is, no one seemed to care about any of the explanations. I guess a delayed plane is a delayed plane, and you just have to endure. Which we did. Doesn’t mean we had to like it. And we didn’t.

On another flight I took this weekend, I noticed something new and odd: people were still yakking away on their cells, even as we taxied down the runway and took off. I was faintly shocked.

Then, even before we landed (still in the air!), I noticed even more passengers on their cells, calling people to say, Yeah, were about to land, Ill be home when I told you I would. You know, vital communications. So where were the flight attendants? Strapped into their little seats, oblivious to all this.

Now, we can joke about this and I think most of us know that cell phone usage isnt really going to crash a plane BUT what bothers me is, people disobeying the flight attendants. No, I’m not that much of a Pollyanna, but in a real emergency, I think we do have to be prepared to do what the crew tells us, otherwise all is chaos. I think.

So why did these bozos decide to get on their phones? Maybe its a mini-rebellion: getting on your cell is one thing you can control, in a world of delays/cancellations/crummy seats, etc., etc. Am I seeing conspiracies where none exist? Could be! I should point out that some of the folks on the phones had those fancy new Apple deals. I think they were just showing off.

Okay, you can’t load up the car; too far to drive. So you fly, and heres how ya do it:

1. ONE PARENT: Save money; have just one parent travel with the incoming freshman. Also, this will prevent many bad words being exchanged between Mom and Dad as they try to cram all the kids stuff into a 5 by 5 cell, I mean, dorm room.
2. DO MAXIMUM BAGGAGE: Each of you (parent/child) checks 2-large suitcases, and each takes a carry-on.
3. PARENT PACKS LIGHT: Make sure the parent packs almost nothing so the freshman can fill all 4-suitcases.
4. SHOP ON ARRIVAL: Once you get to the university, bring the suitcases to the dorm; then proceed to the big-box of your choice (Target, Wal-Mart, whatever) to shop for sheets/pillows/towels, toiletries, etc.
5. WEATHER: Note that, no matter where your kid goes to school, you can be sure it will be about 100-degrees on move-in day, and of course, the dorm will not be air-conditioned. Plan accordingly (actually, there is no way to plan; just sweat and try not to die).
6. SHIPPING: Await email from freshman, which will detail all the things they left at home, which must be immediately shipped to them in the most expensive manner possible.

Yeah, yeah, we could all buy our own jets and the problem would disappear. But until then, the fine folks at Gadget Duck have the solution: Knee Defender!

Knee Defender is basically 2-little plastic clips that you attach to your tray table arms which prevents the galoot in front of you from lowering his seat back. Only problem is, it can only be used when your tray table is down, so its great if youre using a laptop or eating, but the gizmo cant do much otherwise. Still, its a steal at $14.95.

And what about that galoot in front of you? The Gadget Duckians arent completely heartless: they have a Knee Defender card you’re supposed to give the fellow before you lock him the standard upright position, a card that politely asks him not recline. But at the first sign he’s going to do it anyway, whip out the Knee Defender and watch the fun!

As they say at Gadget Duck, The right to recline my seat ends where the other mans knee begins.