A passenger on a domestic Vietnam Airlines flight said he had $11,192 in his carryon, which he stowed in an overhead bin. Big mistake – I’d put it on my person or cradle that bag in my arms.

Sure enough, when the plane landed in Dong Hoi, he looked for the money, but it had disappeared.

Happy ending, though – flight attendants searched for the money as the plane continued onto another destination, and found it stashed under a seat (not the one the guy had been sitting in). The money was returned in full to its rightful owner.

Three flight attendants – presumably not the ones that discovered the hidden cash – have since been suspended, and an investigation is continuing.

True, airline fees have gone up and nobody’s giving away those cans of Pringles, but still –$11 thousand dollars?? You were kind of asking for it, buddy…

Five Swedish men apparently ALL sent someone they met on the internet $1,850 each, so that this someone – purportedly, a woman in Thailand and presumably pretty darn good looking – could use the money to buy an airline ticket and come and visit them.

Of course, I’m sure each of each of our heroes thought he was “The One” – none of them seemed to know about the others, but there they all were, gathered at the airport in Marsta, Sweden – waiting for Miss Right to step off the plane. But of course, “she” never showed.

Credit where credit is due: two of these guys had the courage to go to the cops and file fraud charges, for whatever good that’ll do.

Meanwhile, I suspect that somewhere in Bangkok, there’s one happy fellow who is now $9,250 richer.

18 year old Colton Harris-Moore is suspected of stealing at least three small private planes – he flies off with them. And then he crashes them. Well, at least one of them, but then, he’s never had a flying lesson so there you go.

Anyway, he’s got some Facebook fans (quelle surprise) who liken him to “Jesse James – without the murders” (plug time: if you want to read more about the real, murderous Jesse, and learn how you can see his ghost, see Rick’s Halloween post on the subject).

Where was I? Oh, yeah, the kid – anyway, police consider this kid a fugitive – he was doing time in a juvenile facility for other misdeeds, then walked away from his half-way house – and now he sort of lives in the wilds of the Northwest – out in the woods or in empty cabins.

Gotta love mothers – Colton’s mother says, her baby hasn’t been stealing any planes, adding “Wouldn’t you need a little bit of training in flying a plane? They’re not easy.”

No, they’re not, Mom. That’s why he crashed that last one. Allegedly.

Whoa.

A Boston TV stations is reporting that the FBI has questioned two flight attendants (and maybe more) who were on an American Airlines flight yesterday – the flight where ?a “bomb threat” note was found in one of the aircraft’s lavatories.

Here’s the kicker: again, per Boston’s 7News, those same flight attendants (a man and a woman) were also questioned about a similar incident that occurred two weeks ago.

In both cases, nothing was found – but the incidents resulted in tedious delays for the passengers.

I’m kind of hoping it’s not the crew. I mean, if it is, well…how creepy is that?

The DEA has arrested a bunch of people who were allegedly involved in an extracurricular for-profit business – smuggling drugs from Puerto Rico to the U.S. mainland.

The entrepreneurial entourage included 8 American Airlines employees, who worked in Miami and San Juan.

Listen, we know times are tough, but sheesh – crime is never the answer. Well, okay, sometimes it seems like crime pays, but really – it doesn’t.

AA’s Tim Wagner said, “We hope the actions of a few employees don’t reflect negatively on the tens of thousands of ethical American Airlines employees who work hard to serve the public daily.”

I’m with you there, Tim.

Word to the wise: in China, do not put hand in cookie jar.

I’d say, just ask the former head of the state owned airport holding company – that runs 30 airports throughout China – except, you can’t. He’s been executed by authorities.

What’d he do? According to news reports, he embezzled more than $12 million dollars – and accepted almost $4 million more in bribes.

In case you didn’t realize it, China is serious about stamping out official corruption – as one fellow learned the really, really hard way.

A 50 year old man from Anaheim, California was convicted last week of interfering with a flight crew. But the guy was very lucky — the federal jury deadlocked on the charge of assaulting a crew member.

The passenger in question was aboard a United flight from Hong Kong to LAX when he got “unruly” (love that word). According an LA Times report, prosecutors said the man “had been drinking and was so belligerent and verbally abusive that crew members, a passenger and [an] off-duty pilot restrained his hands with plastic handcuffs.”

Which didn’t prevent him from punching the off-duty pilot in the neck when the pilot tried put his hand on the guy’s shoulder to try and keep the raging fellow in his seat. That’s when he was duct taped to his seat. When he started chewing his way out of the duct tape, they brought out metal handcuffs which did the trick.

He could face 20 years, but prosecutors say he’ll likely get less time — sentencing is in the fall.

Don’t drink and fly.

Pity poor Mytchell Mora, a 39-year-old “freelance entertainment news producer.” This guy can’t get arrested!

Literally. Mora traveled to Cuba, breaking the U.S. travel ban there, and upon his return, ‘fessed up to the Customs folks, and – nada.

He didn’t even get his purchases confiscated – including his red-and-green souvenir Che Guevara beret!

His point, of course, is to challenge the travel ban, and I suppose, do away with it. However, this is the fourth time he’s apparently broken the law by traveling to Cuba, with little to show for it. Apparently, no one cares – or else the feds got bigger fish to fry.

Don’t know if you’ve ever heard of Freddie Gonzales, but he was news back in 1989.

That’s when Freddie, a convicted armed robber, and a colleague (okay, cell mate) escaped from prison in a helicopter that had been hijacked by his wife.

Of course, they were later caught and everyone went back to prison (the missus, too) – but you’d be surprised how many people go the escape-from-prison-by-helicopter route. Wiki has tons of examples – including my favorite, a Miami prison break that failed because too many guys hopped aboard and the overloaded helicopter crashed in the yard. Oops!

There have been a few movies on the subject, most notably I suppose, 1975’s “Breakout” with Charles Bronson. Can’t go wrong with Chuck.

Meanwhile, Freddie Gonzales is a pretty lucky guy – he’s out of prison and he’s only 41 years old (his wife is out now, too, but I don’t know if they’re still together). However, Mr. Escapee must still undergo another ten years of “intensive supervision.”

Crime – it does not pay.

You may remember the tale of these two fellows -if not, check this out – it’s a good read.

One of them was – allegedly – a rogue airline employee of US Airways. His buddy (and roommate) was a passenger on US Airways. Together, police say, they pulled the old switcheroo by exchanging carryon bags at the gate — so the passenger could board his plane with a handgun on him.

Both have now been formally charged in federal court.

Both are out on bail. I don’t know what else going on in the life and times of Mr. Passenger but Mr. Airline Employee is now Mr. Ex-Employee.

When the economy tanks, too often people become predators – and prey.

And according to USA Today, the hotel industry is increasingly feeling the effects of this. Most of the crime is theft, of course – as it always is – along with vehicle break-ins (just another form of thievery).

So what to do? You know what to do. I’m just here to remind you.

1. Anytime you’re in your room, make sure the door is shut and locked (bolt and chain, too).
2. Don’t bring expensive jewelry with you when you travel. If you do, keep it in the hotel safe – but you might want to check the extent of the hotel’s liability, just in case the safe is robbed.
3. Don’t open the door to strangers. So no ordering in. If you’re too tired to go out to eat, pick up something on your way back to the hotel.

See the rest of the tips — on Rick Seaney’s blog — right here.

She kicked at seats, then roamed the United plane, babbling incoherently.

And for the piece de resistance – she allegedly drank a dispenser of liquid hand soap from one of the plane’s lavatories.

Not surprisingly, the culprit – described as a Russian-born artist living in London – caused the LA to London flight to be diverted to Bangor, Maine. She apparently told authorities she consumed sleeping pills, prescription medications, an undetermined amount of alcohol – and yes, according to reports, liquid hand soap (a UK newspaper following the situation helpfully informs us that “liquid soap is sometimes consumed for its alcohol content”).

The woman’s explanation for all this? “It’s typical of me. I sometimes do crazy things.”

By the way, she’d gone to LA to meet up with someone she met online. I’m thinking somebody is counting their lucky stars right about now…

…and One Completely Clueless Airline.

The airline is Northwest – the action takes place at Oregon’s Portland International – and the tale is courtesy of the Oregonian.

A Northwest baggage handler – one Bridgette Bunnell – calls the cops back in January to report that one of her underlings, Jose Trejo Romero, is stealing stuff from checked-bags.

According to an affidavit, the police put in surveillance cameras and sure enough, there’s Jose shoving stuff down his shirt and later hauling it off to his locker. Good stuff like jewelry, laptops, designer handbags and more.

And then, the cops get another tip – suggesting they might want to question Bunnell a little more closely. Turns out (again, according the affidavit) the woman who ratted out the baggage handler, was in on the thefts, and only called the cops when Jose quit giving her a share of the loot!

It gets better. Way back last summer, several employees actually went to Northwest management and told them about the thefts – and nothing was done! In fact the supervisor of the two alleged thieves admits he heard rumors, but apparently didn’t do anything about it – even though he was aware that Bunnell was “frequently on the airline computer listing purses on eBay”.

Couple of questions:

• How come the cops had to put in surveillance cameras? Why weren’t any in place?
• How come (according to the affidavit) Jose and Bunnell were able to get away with this for two years?
• How come the supervisor lets employees use airline computers for personal fencing?

That’s a pretty good description of what happened in Manhattan yesterday – “felony stupidity”.

Here’s the deal: there was some sort of “classified” government photo shoot by the military – of course it was classified! – which involved a low flying plane near some of those tall buildings in New York, and gosh if it didn’t remind people of something…

And some ran screaming out of their buildings in terror.

You know, it hasn’t even been eight years. Did you think we’d forget? Ever?

Yeah, they’re all apologizing. As if.

With everything there is to worry about in the world of travel today like catching swine flu – you’d think the idiots would calm down for awhile.

But, no.

A man rushed the cockpit of a Tel Aviv-bound Delta flight on Friday, banged on the door – and was then rushed by passengers and crew. Nice work, everyone.

I heard they tied him up with a bunch of seatbelts – “Here’s your straitjacket, sir” – and naturally, the flight had to be diverted. It went to Boston, where the cops were waiting.

Unfortunately no one seems to know why he did what he did. And that kills me – all this tsuris what with the delays and all – and no one even asks him why? Believe me – I would have.

Great article by travel expert Christopher Elliott here – he warns, there are more and more trip insurance scams out there.

Elliott has some excellent tips. The bummer is, you have to do some work — a fair amount of research just to figure out if you are or aren’t being scammed. But it could save you thousands.

For example, is the policy you’re being sold “insurance” or “protection”? As Elliott points out, insurance is regulated by your state, while protection is not. And even if your trip insurance is legit, does it cover what you want it to? Beware those “existing medical condition” clauses.

Above all – don’t take anyone’s word for anything – read the policy yourself. Every word. And if you don’t understand it, give it to someone who does. Someone you trust.

Simply shocking.

According to ABC, there are baggage thieves at Houston’s George Bush Intercontinental Airport -and an unidentified Continental employee claims, the thieves are her colleagues.

The woman goes on to say that she’s actually seen these jerks rifle through bags and take stuff.

That stinks of course, but I’m not too crazy about this unidentified woman either – I mean, nowhere in this report does it say what this woman did with the knowledge that some of her co-workers were stripping peoples’ bags – did she tell her superiors, call the cops? I don’t know. I’d like to know.

Continental naturally, says thefts are rare, but they have security in place, work with the police, blah and blah. And, as ABC points out, plenty of other airlines have had their problems with employee theft.

Tip: Don’t put valuables in checked-bags. Ever.

Like the airlines don’t have it tough enough these days…

According to the Chicago Tribune, a former fundraiser for ex-Gov. Rod Blagojevich is accused of working some sort of scheme to rip off United and American Airlines.

The scheme? Well, it had to do with roofing work at O’Hare. Clearly, not all “schemes” are sexy.

Supposedly it involved inflating the price of the roofing work and some of that money was allegedly siphoned off for gambling debts. Okay, that sounds a little more nefarious.

And the airlines may have overspent to the tune of millions. That must be some roof they have.

You have to love it: stunt pilot, rich guy, family man, and “affable charmer” – oh, yeah, and also alleged defrauder – my goodness, but Marcus Schrenker is in a spot of trouble.

I think jumping out of his plane and then letting it crash was his first mistake – or was that his 51^st?

Too bad – Schrenker went to a fine university. Plus, he used to be a cheerleader. Hey, so was Samuel L. Jackson – and George W. Bush!

“Don’t come near me,” the man warned. “I have a bomb. I have a bomb.”

That’s what some of the passengers aboard Delta’s flight 110 heard yesterday as the plane was getting close to landing in Los Angeles. According to a report in the Los Angeles Times, an agitated passenger ran down the aisle, pushed a flight attendant to the floor, and was trying to open an emergency exit while telling everyone — he had a bomb.

But that didn’t stop several passengers from taking action — jumping on the man, and eventually subduing him. It wasn’t easy, according to one of those passengers:

“He was struggling hard-core. He was going nuts.” –Chris Llewellyn, passenger who helped subdue bomb suspect

There was no bomb, as it turned out, but the passengers who tackled the man had no way of knowing that.

“I was glad I was on a plane where passengers fought,” one of the witnesses told the LA Times. “It was great the passengers got involved.”

Yes, it was great — even more so when you learn that a source told the paper that — there was no air marshall on the flight.

The FAA is reminding air travelers departing from Hawaiian airports not to pack fireworks in their luggage.

In related news, the FDA is reminding people not to eat hamburger that’s been soaked in turpentine.

According to a recent report, Hawaii “accounted for 17 of the 48 fireworks cases in the Western-Pacific region in 2008″ — cases where fireworks were illegally stowed in luggage.

Here’s the deal: don’t do it. You could be fined or jailed. And you will be forced to wear that “King of the Stupids” crown for life.

An Australian man is in jail, after he “faked” being an engineer for Qantas — for almost a year (and thank you, gadling, for the tip).

Apparently this guy forged an engineer’s license, posed as a supervising airline engineer, and inspected 747’s.

Sort of like the Leonardo DiCaprio character in “Catch Me If You Can” — well, sort of — Leo probably couldn’t have killed anybody and this inspector wacko could have. Think about it.

And while you’re at it, think about why he pretended to be an airline engineer. An astronaut, I could see that. A cowboy, absolutely. An engineer? I don’t think so…

Did you know? Some 637,000 laptops are lost at U.S. airports each year — lost, or — STOLEN!

At least according to one report. But I’m sure plenty do disappear. And the solution, according to the fine folks at TurboBag? Why…a TurboBag.

Now, I don’t own one, but they sound good. For those who don’t know, a TurboBag is one of those new, TSA-approved laptop bags that you can put through security — without removing the laptop. Great idea. One less thing to worry about — and that means less stress, according to the TurboBag folks — and that, they suggest, means you’ll be more alert to laptop thieves.

Maybe. You’re still going to be fiddling with your shoes and looking around for your belt, and what could happen is, a the thief makes off with a laptop in a nice snazzy TurboBag.

Again, don’t get me wrong, the bag sounds cool (and they start at just $39.95) — but the BEST thing you can do during the holidays and any days is — watch your stuff like an eagle-eyed hawk. Yep, two metaphors for the price of one to show you how serious I am about this.

A drunken passenger on a Turkish Airlines flight tried to hijack a plane today – the flight was from Turkey to Russia.

No one’s sure where this guy wanted to go, or why – only that he did not get there.

Details are hard to come by – as news accounts put it, there is “no further information about how the passenger was brought under control”.

Hmmm. Gotta wonder what “brought under control” means. But brought under control he was.

UPDATE: Guy was “overpowered by fellow passengers.” He had claimed he had a bomb, but really all he had was drink after drink after drink… Or so it’s alleged.

Well, we can all relax. That allegedly creepy guy who tied up the hands of a 16 year old girl (who was watching over her 9-year old sister) was engaging in nothing more than “horseplay”. Ergo, nothing bad happened – so – let the guy go!

Not so fast, said the U.S. Magistrate in Denver – she said there was enough evidence against the guy to move forward with assault charges.

One of the reasons the guy’s lawyer urged that the charges be dismissed was that “the girls didn’t scream.”

I like to point out that teenagers can be too embarrassed to scream. They shouldn’t be, but it happens.